Where do I go from here?

For a while my heart has been heavy with so many things that I want to put out and share here in this forum, that I don’t have any idea where to begin. I have just been letting God lead me. I started to do this for cathartic reasons. This was a way for me to share my thoughts and feelings, essentially without being interrupted until I completed my thought… and you have seen how long that can take sometimes for me. I am no writer. But last night God told me to “get it all out there”, so I will for the following reasons.

  1. For the Glory of God.
  2. For the weight it lifts off me.

I had no idea that people find “my story” inspiring, uplifting, and so many other adjectives that humble me, I can’t even believe.

When I received my Brain Injury almost two years ago now, I had no idea how dramatically my life would change. God had to literally “hit me in the head” to get my attention. Now though that he has it, I want others to know how easy it is to change.

OK, that is an overstatement, change is NOT easy! At least while we try to control the change, and change under our terms. “I’ll change what is easy now and work on the harder stuff later”. That is how man changes. When God changes you, it is a scary freedom. From what I am told it happens different for everyone, but for me, over time I started to notice that desires and priorities shifted off of me, and onto Him. For me it was like “Whew, I don’t need to worry about that, God has it… Holy Crap! I don’t have to worry about that because God has it”

Trust is such a big word to have so few letters. But I can absolutely tell you, the more trust you give Him, the more blessings you get back from Him. That is how God works when you let him. It is not always easy, it’s not all cake and ice cream, He will test you to make sure your pot committed. Just never give up trust, and know with confidence and belief in your heart, that your deuce/seven will beat the pocket aces sitting across the table, when you trust Him! (This is of course a metaphorical reference, don’t blame me for what happens at the tables after you read this. God is not a magic genie in a bottle for you to use at your convenience, He is a heart change, a lifestyle change and a commitment that you will feel like a wave of freedom cleansing you.)

My plan is to start a chronological attempt at my life. Where that leads, God know and has a plan for, all I have to do is trust and show up. So if your interested, lets see where this goes.

One thought on “Where do I go from here?

  1. Saw this today and thought of you!

    What shall I say? Father, save me, from this hour? But for this cause came I unto this hour. Father, glorify Thy name. — John 12:27-29 (R.V.)

    “My attitude as a saint to sorrow and difficulty is not to ask that they may be prevented, but to ask that I may preserve the self God created me to be through every fire of sorrow. Our Lord received Himself in the fire of sorrow, He was saved not from the hour, but out of the hour.

    We say that there ought to be no sorrow, but there is sorrow, and we have to receive ourselves in its fires. If we try and evade sorrow, refuse to lay our account with it, we are foolish. Sorrow is one of the biggest facts in life; it is no use saying sorrow ought not to be. Sin and sorrow and suffering are, and it is not for us to say that God has made a mistake in allowing them.

    Sorrow burns up a great amount of shallowness, but it does not always make a man better. Suffering either gives me my self or it destroys my self. You cannot receive your self in success, you lose your head; you cannot receive your self in monotony, you grouse. The way to find yourself is in the fires of sorrow. Why it should be so is another matter, but that it is so is true in the Scriptures and in human experience. You always know the man who has been through the fires of sorrow and received himself, you are certain you can go to him in trouble and find that he has ample leisure for you. If a man has not been through the fires of sorrow, he is apt to be contemptuous, he has no time for you. If you receive yourself in the fires of sorrow, God will make you nourishment for other people.”
    –Oswald Chambers

    Liked by 1 person

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